soolooxcoopter: obesealpaca: When an employee at the McDonald’s drive through asks me how I’m doing, I always ask them back, just in case they need someone to talk to because you never know Those fries could be salted with tears So you’re the fucker who slows down the drive through
me: ew the ice cream is melting
my friend: quick put it close to your heart to keep it cold
kellyykao: katear: i-fuck-nuns: ...
Probably the best 6 seconds ever.
ophi1ia: I wish I went to detention for 9 hours and came out with 3 new best friends and a boyfriend why am I not in an 80’s movie
digitaldoggy: one time this dude was being stupid so i said “well you can’t spell stupid without u” and he got really angry and shouted “WELL THERE’S AN ‘I’ IN STUPID TOO” and i just stared at him for a rly long time
That awkward moment when all your friends are...
When I go to bed after watching a scary movie
lolsofunny: As a child: Today:
My brother is such a troll..
Brother: Brah', I have to ask you something..
Me: What is it, is it important?
Brother: It's a life or death situation, I just don't know what to do.
Me: Who's this nigga, where he live, you want me to slice him?
Brother: Nah man, it's far worse than someone trying to beat me up..
Me: Dude, you can tell me, I'm here for you.
Brother: But I'm afraid if I tell you, you'll never look at me the same..
Me: You're not gay are yo-
Brother: Shut the fuck up, I get more girls than you.. and no it's not that.
Me: Well what is it?!
Brother: I.. am diagnosed with Sexiness.
Me: Get the fuck out of my room.
sasha-y: My boyfriend does this adorable thing where he doesn’t exist
during MATH examinations, some people solve...
greenloverxd: when I just sit there and solve my problems like:
When your teacher complains about having to grade... →
Bitch you gave us the work!
matchooo718 asked: DID I EVER TOLD YOU THAT YOUR REALLY CUTE
When someone tells me I'm pretty/cute:
At first I’m all: Then I’m like: “Wait…” Submitted by: anyoneanythinganyhow
While walking with your friends...
greenloverxd: … Cool boys and their friends … Cool girls and their friends … You and your friends
ohdangitstrisha: OMFG I CAN’T OMGOMG LOOOOOOL
faithsanjuan asked: HEEEEY BUDDDDYY :D
when you see free samples at the grocery store.